Realization
by EverlastingEvanescence
Summary: This is a Hitori Bocchi no Marumaru Seikatsu fanfiction. Hitori Bocchi feels abandoned by Kai Yawara, so she decides to change their relationship forever, even if it crushes her on the inside. I know not a lot of people would agree with me on Kai Yawara, and I haven't read the manga, but ignoring Bocchi trying to tell Kai about the friends she made really rubbed me the wrong way


Realization

Hitori Bocchi saw her old friend, Kai Yawara, at the mall. Her other friends, Nako Sunao, Aru Honsho, and Sotca Luckythar were looking at a shop that sold various oddities. Bocchi couldn't take her eyes off her old friend, despite the fact that her friend didn't acknowledge her. Bocchi had made this decision yesterday, one that would change her life for a long time to come, and no matter what was going to follow through on it. She walked up to Kai, and turned her around, knowing that she wouldn't have answered her if she called.

"Hey-," Kai started to shout before she felt something small enter one of her hands. When she was let go, she opened her hand and saw the 'Do Your Best' Fairy that she had given Bocchi. Kai looked up and saw the back of Bocchi's head, walking away as fast as she could. This didn't stop her from running up to her and grabbing her sleeve.

"Bocchi, what's going on? Why did you give this back to me, don't you still need this?" Kai asked, holding up the shirtless and mustachioed doll that she had given to Bocchi when they graduated elementary school.

"No I don't," Bocchi mumbled, hoping that the conversation would end here, but it didn't.

"But…you still have friends to make," Kai said, confused as ton Bocchi's new behavior.

"Yeah, and I'm going to make them on my own time, and I'm not going to be forced to rush into this by someone who I thought was my friend," Bocchi said, glaring at Kai, who's eyes nearly bulged out of her head from shock.

"What do you mean by 'thought'? We are friends, and this whole thing was to help…" Kai tried to explain, but was cut off by Bocchi.

"No, you weren't trying to help. You know how hard it was for me to talk to people, and you thought that the best thing for me was to go and talk to everyone in my class in two years. You didn't even try and help me talk to people, give me advice, you just threw me into the deep end without any support! A real friend wouldn't have done that and would've at least tried to help, but you never did!" Bocchi countered, her eyes tearing up from both anger and sadness. She was trembling, trying her hardest not to succumb to the glare Kai was giving back to her.

"I was trying to help you! It's not my fault you couldn't handle the pressure! You think you can handle life without interacting with people!? You're wrong, and I knew you weren't going to do it by yourself so I had to give you a push! It's that simple! Plus, you made friends because of my idea, so you should be at least a little grateful!" Kai argued back, pushing Bocchi back. Rather than cower away from this confrontation, Bocchi stepped up until she was face to face with Kai.

"You put me in the deep end without knowing how to swim! You know that I have social anxiety, and yet you left me all alone to talk to people I don't know! Do you know how stressful that was for me!? The constant sleepless nights thinking of how to talk to people were all because you threatened to stop being my friend, and you want me to be grateful!? You couldn't even look at me when I tried to show you my progress like I was a stranger to you! Did our friendship really mean that little to you that you could throw it away like it was nothing but a piece of trash!?" Bocchi yelled back, causing Kai to uncharacteristically cower.

"I-," Kai started before she was interrupted.

"No, you listen! I've made friends who have stood by me through everything this year. Whether it was making friends, studying, or because I was having a bad day, they were there for me, while you were trying to forget that I ever existed! I don't deserve to be treated like that, and I don't want to have anything to do with you anymore. I'd rather be with my real friends who like me for who I am than someone who put me in an uncomfortable situation for her own gain!" Bocchi exclaimed, before walking away from Kai, with subtle confidence in her stride as she left to find her friends. Kai looked on with a thousand-yard stare, possibly the last time that she would ever see Bocchi, the girl who had worked so hard to impress her and now she was gone and out of her life.

Kai's emotions were in overdrive, and she didn't know what to do. Part of her wanted to run after Bocchi and explain her side of the story, but there was a much louder part of her that told her that Bocchi was done listening to her and it would probably be pointless. Kai just hung her head down, and walked away, forcing herself not to look back in Bocchi's direction clutching the Do Your Best Fairy with all her might, out of fear that she might just lose it and start bawling in the middle of the mall.

Meanwhile, Bocchi had significantly calmed down after some heavy breathing before she met up with Nako at the food court.

"Where are the others?" Bocchi asked as she sat down in the seat directly across from Nako.

"Sotca's parents called and she said she had to go back home, and Aru wanted to study for a project she has coming up," Nako answered, satisfying Bocchi's curiosity. "So…did you tell her?"

"Yeah."

"And…how do you feel?"

"You know what? I actually feel…pretty good. I feel like a weight's been lifted from my shoulders and I can actually start enjoying myself rather than stress about befriending everyone," Bocchi explained before she looked down at the floor. "Though there is a small part of me that'll miss Kai. She was my first and only friend for such a long time, so it's going to be hard to get used to things without her, but I know I'll manage," Bocchi elaborated, springing her head back up with a small smile, with the corner of her eyes pricking with tears.

"Hey, we're not asking you to get over it in the blink of an eye. We know it'll take a while for you to move on, and we're all willing to see you through it," Nako responded, moving closer to Bocchi to put an arm around her shoulder. Bocchi smiled up at her friend, and gave her a hug, with her face buried in her shirt. Nako smiled and hugged her back before letting her go and spending the rest of their time at the mall eating and talking.


End file.
